“Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again”

I just finished my 25th journal.  It took me nearly a year to fill it and now that it's done I feel almost relieved.  A lot happened in this past year.  Now I literally don't have to carry it around with me.  I was listening to Anberlin's album New Surrender and the song Breathe stuck out to me.  I feel like that song describes how I feel right now.
It's long overdue, but I've finally closed that chapter of my life.  Sam isn't someone I need to waste any more time on.  I don't need to dwell on what happened. I'm free.

Breathe
Anberlin

This is surrender
To a war-torn life I've lived.
Scars and stripes forever
In need of change I can't resist.

No need to hide anything anymore.
Can't return to who I was before.

I can finally breathe.
Suddenly alive.
I can finally move.
The world feels revived.

This long of a struggle
Finally opened up my eyes.
Revolution's not easy
With a Civil War on the inside.

No need to hide anything anymore.
Can't return to who I was before.

I can finally breathe.
Suddenly alive.
I can finally move.
'Cause I realize.

I can finally breathe.
Suddenly alive.
I can finally move.
The world feels revived.

I can finally breathe.
Suddenly alive.
I can finally move.
'Cause I realize.

I can finally breathe.
Suddenly alive.
I can finally move.
The world feels revived.

I can finally breathe.
I can finally move.
The world feels revived.




Hurray for beginning again!

“Music is an outburst of the soul"

I was listening to music on Spotify today when I came across a Hello Saferide song I hadn't heard before.  It's called I Wonder Who is like This One  and likens people to songs. 

It's fantstic.  I'm obsessed.  Here are the lyrics:

People are like songs, it’s true

Some seem dull at first but then they grow on you

Me, I’m like ”Can’t get you out of my head”

Annoying at times, but I make you wanna dance

But you are the only one I’ve met who’s ”God only knows”

I liked you the first time I met you

And it grows and grows and grows

People are like songs, I swear

Some found you as a child, and still they’re always there

A boy I once knew was ”Anarchy in the UK”

Burned out too quickly but in such a beautiful way

And you are the only one I’ve met who’s ”God only knows”

I liked you the first time I met you

And it grows and grows and grows

People are like songs, I’ve been told

Some claim your ears but you never hear story unfold

Oh, ”Lady gaga” or ”Your high school friends”

Reminds you of times when you were someone else

Then ”God only knows” and you pared up as two

As the turn of the seasons you come and go

I can never claim control of either of you

You’re too sweet to be just mine alone

And I try to stay humble over the fact that

Sometime when the time is right you will pass my door

The crescendo comes and…

And ”God only knows” and you have the same sad similarity

That every time it’s over I want to press play again

But the only difference appears to be 

I can force it on one of you and on the other I can’t

I'm the kind of person that puts songs to people, moods, certain events, etc.  I find joy in lyrics and I like music more when I can connect to the words I hear.  It's something that stirs the soul and fills me with so much emotion.  Music and poetry become the marriage of expression that I love.

Goodness, I love a good song.

Day 23: One of my current favorite tunes

Last year I dated this guy who was mostly into heavy metal music that I couldn't stand.  However, he did share a few gems with me that I love.  This is my most favorite.  I could listen to this song on repeat all day.

"Sideways"

Citizen Cope

You know it ain't easy 

For these thoughts here to leave me

There's no words to describe it

In French or in English

Well, diamonds they fade

And flowers they bloom

And I'm telling you

These feelings won't go away

They've been knockin' me sideways

They've been knockin' me out lately

Whenever you come around me

These feelings won't go away 

They've been knockin' me sideways

I keep thinking in a moment that

Time will take them away

But these feelings won't go away